Little gifts to lighten the load

Tonight God gave me a sweet gift.

One month ago, my mom died.  She was young, and had no terminal illness.  The accident that claimed her life came as a complete shock to our family.  And yet, I feel an amazing sense of peace.

My mom had absolute confidence that God is real and trusted that because of Jesus Christ, she would someday be resurrected.  In my childhood, my mom and dad planted the seed of my faith and nurtured it, but as I matured, I had to come to know for myself whether what my parents had always taught me was true.  Through many experiences over the years, I have come to know for myself that God lives and that He is our father.  He loves each of us with a depth of love we cannot comprehend.  He sent us to earth to learn, to serve others, and to become more like Him.  When we have finished our work on earth, he will take us home to enjoy whatever level of light and joy we are willing to embrace.

Sometimes painful, even tragic, things happen to us, and He allows those experiences to come into our lives because He knows that they will make us stronger and better, that they will give us compassion and understanding and greater desire to relieve the pain of others.  He knows that in the times of our greatest suffering, we can draw near to Him and receive the greatest measure of His peace.  He weeps for our sorrows and sent His Son to relieve our suffering.

I know with certainty that I will see my mom again, and I am eager for that day.  I also know that God is giving me precious gifts to sweeten this hard time.

One of those gifts came tonight.  Early in the evening, my husband and I went on a date together and explored a small town near our home.  In one of the shops, one could buy a bottle and mix essential oils to create a unique scent that could be worn as perfume.  As I was getting ready for bed, I thought about going back to mix a scent for myself sometime.  I remembered that Mom had seemed interested in mixing a personalized scent for herself when one of my sisters told us about having mixed her own, and let us smell it.  As I thought about that exchange, I remembered that it had occurred during my last face-to-face conversation with my mom before her death, when she and my family visited my new home.

I teared up as I realized that Heavenly Father had answered a little prayer that mattered only to me.  A few days ago, I pictured Mom and my sister and me sitting on the floor in my younger daughter’s bedroom talking, and I could not remember what we had talked about.  I felt so sad not to remember my last conversation with Mom, and thought a little half-prayer that I would remember.  Tonight, in a quiet, simple way, Heavenly Father reminded me.  It was a beautiful gift.

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4 thoughts on “Little gifts to lighten the load

  1. What a precious gift! I know Heavenly Father hears and answers our prayers – even the little ones. I want to remind you, as you continue to seek for sunshine, that you are a daughter of both earthly and heavenly parents. They have both planted in you a brightness that lights up the room around you. Your smile is radiant and is another gift you clearly got from your mom. Even though it’s hard, keep smiling. Every time you do, you share your mom’s smile with the world around you. As Sally said today, it is better to look up. I may continue to stumble as I try to say the right things to comfort you my friend. Please know that if you need anything, I am looking for ways to help. Love, Emily

  2. Sounds like you are doing mostly okay. I am SO proud of you all. There is no way that Heavenly Father would have called your mother home if he hadn’t known you all could do it. I know that she is proud of you all, too. I am thinking that as a little treat for yourself, you need to design a scent that makes you think of your momma. It needs to smell like fresh breezes, and pink cheeks. Love to you, Sweetie!

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